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Title: What happens in Santa Barbara stays in Santa Barbara. (Part Two)

Title: What happens in Santa Barbara stays in Santa Barbara. (Part Two)
Rating:  a bit NC-17
Pairing: Jack/Ianto, Shawn/Lassiter
Disclaimer: I don't own anything from either Universe's. Includes merchandise, franchise, collector items, Characters etc.
Summary: “Okay why are we in America again”
Warning: Gwen Bashing, Angst, and Fluffiness

A/N: Written for the crossover challenge for AGA. Yep I decided to write another one to occupy the daylight between the nights. All my mistakes are my own.


Part Two

Next day

“Ianto, Ianto” Jack was whispering into his ear, His hand moving slowly downwards under the sheet ticker ling his stomach hairs, while he was plastered to his back and slightly rubbing his sex over Ianto’s ass.

“Morning Jack” Ianto whispered back, before his mouth was taken into a sleepy kiss, just as he was about to deepen it, the door to their room banged open

“JACCK, It’s 9am and we got to do some work for today , don’t let Ianto take up all your time” Gwen shouted, Ianto had never lost a hard-on so fast that it made his stomach clench in pain and Jacks hand feeling the wince continued to rub his stomach and he could feel that Jack had lost his as well

“How did you get in?” Jack replied angrily

“Oh I asked the front desk and they gave me a key after I explained that we were special ops and I need to get in contact with you, for some odd reason the bloke behind the desk thinks we are from British Interpol and hope they liked how he helped in the investigation. Strange little man” Gwen continued in that vain for a while, Ianto dug his head into the pillow to get away

“Gwen, get out and I will see you downstairs at the breakfast table” Gwen nodded and looked at Jack wistfully as the sheet had fallen to show his bare chest, before moving out the room and slamming the door behind her.

“Now where were we” Jack purred pulling Ianto into a kiss.

Ianto separated himself from Jack and got out of bed, ignoring a pouting Jack and the lust pouring from him as Ianto walked around naked picking out his clothes for the wardrobe

“I doubt I could even get something up after that, she keeps interrupting us time” Ianto turned his back towards Jack and bent down ignoring Jack’s growl

“Okay have it your way” Jack had got up off the bed and was openly staring at Ianto’s ass

“Jack we need to bloody retcon her and we need to do it fast, I don’t care what she’s thinks she is, she isn’t”

“Okay Yan, we will” Ianto felt a whisper of a kiss on his neck before they both silently got dressed both too lost in their daemons to even notice that they didn’t lock their room properly.


10 minutes later

Jack and Ianto got down to the restaurant serving breakfast, moving inwards they saw Shawn and Carlton sitting at a table eating a bagel breakfast while Gwen was sitting there eating a full English breakfast and more greasy food on top of that, other people were looking at her with barely veiled disgust. Ianto shook his head and got a bowl of fruit with some yogurt and moving to sit next to his cousin While Jack sat on the opposite side next to Gwen


“Morning” they both replied together

“We need to ask some questions etc to sort out your side of the story and then send it off to UNIT” Ianto said after a few bites of fruit

“I understand, Just why are you investigating not UNIT”

“If UNIT were investigating you would be locked in a 9x9 cell waiting for legal council that would never come” Jack responded taking bites out of his toast. Shawn gripped Carlton’s hand and went slightly pale; Carlton rubbed Shawn’s back lightly

“Yes, well we won’t let that happen but if you double-cross us or even think about leaving we will hunt you down” Gwen injected spraying the others with food particles as she burped and finally finished her breakfast

“Ewwww, we were going to take you on a tour of Santa Barbara” intoned Carlton

“That would be nice; it’s a nice day for a walk”

The group stood up to leave as Gwen whined about leaving her coffee near full, they all ignored her and walked out into the sunlight of a crisp but beautiful day.


Police station

“Here’s the police station, where I consult and Carlton is of course the head detective” Shawn happily said wanting for Gwen to catch up with them while she moaned near all the time that her feet ache and why couldn’t they call a taxi.

Walking in, they introduced Ianto, Jack and Gwen to near everybody;

“Here’s Buzz, he’s just got married, and is a close friend

“Shawn, detective I though Chief Vick said you weren’t to come back for a week”

“Yes Buzz, but we are just showing Lassie’s cousin and his fiancée around the area”

“Well it’s nice to meet any family of the detectives” while Shawn introduced them by names.  Buzz held out his hand to Ianto who shook it with clear amusement, then reached out to shake Jack’s hand and just before he reached out to kiss Gwen’s hand she asked

“Wait you just meet us, what makes you think I’m not Carlton’s cousin”

“It’s detective Lassiter to you, Miss Cooper” Carlton snarled back

“Well madam, Carlton is very picky on what he lets out about his family and Ianto here as the same eye colour as the detective” Buzz intoned with a slight suspicious look at Gwen. Just then a voice rang out

“Detective and Spencer, I thought I told you not to come back for a week” Both of them grinned and dragged Ianto and Jack into the Chief’s office

“Chief Vick, this is my cousin Ianto and his fiancé Jack as well as their colleague Miss Cooper”

“Nice to meet you all” Chief Vick smiled and shook everybody’s hand

“Oh My God how’s this adorable boy? “ Gwen squealed so high pitch both Shawn and Ianto had to rub their ears

“That’s my Daughter, she’s 2 years old” Chief Vick replied frostily

“oh, why do you dress her up in boys clothes, when I have Jack’s child It’ll be a girl and we would dress it up only in pink and purple clothes”

“I thought you said that Jack is Ianto’s fiancé” Chief asked Carlton, while the others looked on in astonishment

“He is”

“Jack is only with Ianto because he doesn’t want to acknowledge that Ianto is broken beyond repair and needs to be sanctioned at Providence Park” Gwen continued shooting a snide look at Ianto

Ianto stood up and calmly said “Excuse me” he walked out the room out of the police station with a few enquires if he was okay and just started to walk around.

“What the hell Gwen, you dare say anything like that, in fact that’s it you're FIRED”

“You can’t fire me, how will look after you and be your shoulder to cry on”

“Ianto is all of that, like I would ever come to you for help”

“Well, I’m going off back to the hotel to let you think what you just said to me and let you apologise like I know you will” and with that she flounced off. Jack stood up and growled before walking out the door intent on finding Ianto

The other three sat in the office, Shawn was upset, Carlton was furious and Chief Vick was disgusted and curious

“What the hell happened?”

“My auntie and his mum got put into providence mental institute when he was 7, and she died when he was 9 as she washed away because the doctors called her broken beyond repair” Carlton started grinding his teeth before standing up and walking out to go for a walk around the bay”

“I better go and calm him down before he goes and does something stupid and hit a woman”

“Okay, keep me informed” They both nodded before Shawn walked out and Chief Vick looked out onto the view of her office thinking not very nice thoughts.



As Ianto got back to the hotel, he really needed a sleep, and to calm down his emotions from what Gwen said to him. Checking his phone when he got into his room, he saw it had loads of missed calls from Jack and from Carlton, sending Carlton a message saying that he was in his hotel room, Ianto sat down on his bed waiting for Carlton to come as there were a few things they needed to sort out.

Lying back on the bed, Ianto thought about his family and what happened to them, closing his eyes to stop the tears coming didn’t work well as he cried himself to sleep

Carlton walked into the room where the door was left ajar and closed it behind him, looking towards the bed and seeing Ianto sleeping, tears drying on his face. Carlton knew that life was hard for his cousin when he was younger, so making the decision to lay on the bed with Ianto and curl around him in a protective manner like they use to do when they were younger; Carlton gently stroked his hair and was quickly lulled into a sleep.

Walking into the room, Gwen knew that Jack was still roaming the streets looking for Ianto and that Ianto would be alone in his room, but finding his cousin in there with him only further deepened her mind to anger and rage and the thoughts that they would be better off without them messing up her plans, Gwen has snuck a bottle of aphrodisiac that Jack said was the most potent in the universe and had been banned after only a few days of it being in produce, so when Jack returned to find them both died  he would turn to her for comfort and that’s when she would trap him with having a baby, and if she thought about it, that the handsome man Shawn would also be dynamite in bed that she would go and comfort him as well and as she was the persona of a caring and understanding person nobody would begrudge her.

Quickly moving an act that nobody thought she would be possible for, she had both her arms around them both and cloths filled with cyanide that she got from a backstreet seller, what she didn’t realise that it was actually Bittersweet nightshade, which is rarely fatal.

“Die, you don’t deserve to live after trying to destroy me and Jack”

Ianto woke up and tried to struggle against a cloth that was smelling and tasting bitter against his mouth, feeling a hand next to him tighten and was reassured that Carlton was there and struggerling, looking up into the eyes of there would be killer, Ianto’s eyes opened wide in shock at the sight of Gwen in near orgasm of happiness of killing somebody. Trying to struggle some more Ianto felt he become tired and could feel Carlton next to him slowly stopping as well. With one last buck Ianto managed to throw off Gwen.

Downstairs in the lobby, Jack caught up with Shawn who was talking to a black guy and a blonde haired girl

“Jack, this is Lassies partner Jules and this is Gus my best friend” Shawn answered before Jack could say anything

“We need to get to your room urgently” Jules informed them with a serious face and running off towards the elevator with a load of armed squad guys behind her. Running to catch up with Shawn and managing to squeeze into the elevator before it shut

“What’s going on?”

“We had an undercover agent ring in and say that there was a murder going to go down as a woman brought a bottle of Cyanide from his contact for a murder and she was whispering how she would get back at Ianto for getting between her and Jack. I manage to find a hit that an Ianto Jones and Jack Harkness were staying at the hotel and this is where I meet Shawn who tells me that Ianto is Lassiter’s cousin and they’re both in the room with the dangerous suspect”

“Cyanide! He would die! I’m going to kill Gwen” Jack growled shocked at what was happening

“It wasn’t cyanide it was Bittersweet Nightshade, so it cause temporarily paralysis, sickness, and seizures” the bloke named Gus replied back looking worried

Coming to rest on the floor, the doors pinged open from both sets of elevators and out poured the police team all looking for blood to be spilt as it was there head detective, Jack pulled out his gun and with Jules proceeded to break the door open

“Stop, or we will shoot” Jules shouted

Jack had to stop at the scene in front of him, Gwen was on the floor crying and moaning in pain holding her leg that was in such a weird state that it was obviously broken and on the bed was Ianto and Carlton looking like death had already come if it had not been for them seizing. While the other police handcuffed Gwen and dragged her out, Jack and Shawn ran up to their perspective partners Jack took hold of his Ianto and jerked him up to lean against his chest, feeling the heartbeat of him through his back Jack sighed and heard Shawn do the same with Carlton, a hand squeezed his hand and Jack couldn’t help the sob of relief that Ianto had responded to him.

6 hours later

Jack managed to tear himself away from his love and move to get in contact with Owen and Tosh about the events, Jack couldn’t understand what made her think like that, her trail was in a few days and she would be going down for manslaughter for a long long time, after Ianto had been give and antidote that allowed the paralysis to come off and stopped the seizures that he had given his statement to the police and hunkered down to sleep off the exhaustion from his body. As Jack leaned against the wall outside, Shawn came out the room next to them.

“How is he?” Jack softly inquired

“He’s sleeping, they think that he’s going to be laid up for a while recovering as it was a pretty strong dose, not enough to kill him, but enough to impair him” Shawn had looked up and he looked terrible, dark circles and pale although Jack knew he properly didn’t look any better

“How’s Ianto doing?”

“He’s hanging in there, just tired and wanting to go back to Wales” Jack sighed with all the weight of the world on his shoulders

“When did the doctors say he can go?”

“Not for another couple of days, but our doctor Owen would like to take a look at him for his own assurances”

“Oh okay, do you think you would come again?” Shawn said

“Yes but not for another few months, but I know Ianto would like to stay more in contact with his cousin, plus you could come and visit us?” Jack replied warmly

“You know I think we will, Lassie and I have a few weeks saved up for Christmas and Lassie doesn’t like Christmas when he’s on his own” Shawn enthusiastically replied

“Then come over, I know Ianto would love more family around”

“Don’t you have any family?”

“No, all of them are dead now so it’s just me”

“Well we have to make it extra special” Shawn said smiling

“Jack”, “Shawn” both voices were heard from each of their respective rooms; they both turned around and gave each other a smile of relief before going back in.

Jack entered the room and smiled when he saw that Ianto had already fallen asleep, before climbing onto the bed with him and curling around him, knowing that next door Shawn was doing the same with Carlton.

Unknowing the nurses and well-wishers for Carlton walking past the windows where the blinds were still opened and smiling at them both for looking like they had their own piece of happiness right there. Knowing that the woman who did this to them is locked away and has now been admitted to a metal asylum.



4 Days later

Ianto and Jack were ready to board the plane, Ianto still sitting in the wheelchair as he was too tired to even walk more than 5 paces. Carlton was in exactly the same position.

“Well is suppose this is goodbye” whispered Ianto upset at leaving his family

“We will be coming over for Christmas, but I will miss you to” Carlton said back

Shawn hugged both Jack and Ianto, stepping back with a teary smile, Jack doing the same to both Shawn and Carlton. While Carlton and Ianto shook hands and whispered goodbyes in Welsh and Gaelic while both the others looked on in amusement and slight suspiciousness about what they were talking about especially when they both looked at their respective partners and smiled that wicked smile.

Wheeling Ianto onto the plane into the first class section after waving goodbye, Jack picked Ianto up to put him into the seat

“Jack I can walk a few measly steps myself” Ianto grumbled as Jack put him into the seat and did up his belt.

“Just let me be near you, I almost lost you and I can’t stand the thought of you not being here, I love you Ianto and I will love you to when time runs out” Jack gave the wheelchair to the steward cabin not even knowing that they were looking at him and Ianto with the ‘You’re so adorable’ face. As Ianto settled back into his seat, he leaned into Jack and was nearly falling asleep when Jack whispered a poem in welsh   

In your arms, my thoughts could drift away
to a place, all our own, and a lovelier day.
Lavender sunsets and skies of blue
would be ours to enjoy... just me and you.

In your arms, my only task would be
to make sure your kisses were just for me.
For every kiss, I'd give you four
and show you no one could love you more.

Then, just to prove we would never part,
I'd wrap myself around your heart.
Melting together (as lovers do...)
passion and pleasure beginning anew.

In your arms, you'd know by the look in my eyes
that I was yours- forever more.
And all of our dreams would soon come true.
You'd belong to me, and I... to you.

Ianto fell asleep to the sound of Jack’s voice, listening to the meaning behind those words Ianto knew that even through the up and coming months that Jack will always be there.



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Just wanted to say that I love these stories. Even though Gwen is out of the picture for now I would love to see more of Ianto and his "cousin".. a nice Christmas story perhaps.


Thanxs for reading :)

I proberly will make a christmas story for this, just some fluffines to hit the spot :D

Haha Gwen being sent to an asylum just made my day.

LOL, it made my muse laugh aswell :D

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